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10月22日雅思写作大作文解析

作者: 2016-10-26 10:41 来源:青岛编辑

 

  2016年10月22日雅思大作文题目电视应该播放罪犯审判现场吗?

  In some countries, the criminal trials are shown on the TV and the general public can watch them. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

 

  10月22日的雅思考试涉及的是犯罪题材。以往犯罪题材一般问犯罪的原因,罪犯的惩罚方式,避免犯罪的方法等,但这次要求讨论的话题稍微转换了一个方式,问的是电视播放犯罪审判这个做法到底是好还是坏?可见雅思作文命题非常灵活,备考雅思时适当了解各类题材的基本写法和基本词汇当然非常必要,但若不提高自己的写作实力或者规范自己的写作思维方式,一味抱着背到现题的心态,是很难在雅思写作中奏效的。

  那么,在本次作文的审题中,我们发现两个关键词,一是犯罪审判(criminal trials),二是电视播放(shown on TV)。关于电视播放广告的优劣势这样的题目我们不会陌生,但电视里播放犯罪审判又是一种什么样的情形呢?关键是:讨论这样的题目,我们应该从哪里着手开始呢?经常看唐老师本专栏的同学一定不会陌生唐老师提出的雅思写作“三大层次”说,即物质层次、心理层次和社会层次(请在文章最下方处回看本专栏各期,一定要掌握精髓并在写作中有意识地使用,可以在很大程度上解决雅思作文“写什么”这一难题!)。如果我们将这三大层次用于“电视播放犯罪审判”这个话题,我们就可得到如下一些可用的观点:

 

  赞同:(1)看电视审判犯人,我们可以学到很多关于法律的知识(物质层面);(2)电视审判犯人,可以让观众内心感到害怕,从而不敢犯罪(心理层面);(3)电视审判,关注面大,从而使审判显得更加公正(社会层面)。

  反对:(1)电视审判犯人,必定将犯罪细节公之于众,这在某种程度上是在宣传暴力(物质层面);(2)因为知道要电视播放,法官和律师的注意力往往从案件审理转移到电视作秀,不利于法律的正常实施(心理层面和社会层面)。

  我的观点:作为公民,我们有权利知道犯人是如何得到审判的,因此我赞同电视审判犯人,但是电视审判中也要注意控制那些不宜播放的犯罪细节,并降低电视媒介对审判过程的不良影响。

 

  解析

  7分范文

  Whether criminal trials should be shown on TV or not has always been a controversial issue. After discussing the advantages of this practice and its disadvantages, I come to believe televising criminal trials is a good thing as long as its negative effects are brought well under control.

  Showing criminal trials on TV can serve multiple purposes at the same time such as educational, deterrent and regulatory. When watching how criminals are tried and sentenced, TV viewers will learn a great deal about the law and the legal system. In fact, it was from a televised trial that I finally understood it is a violation of law if you do not stop your car when you see a stop sign. Meanwhile, TV trials can help bring down the crime rate. People are fearful of their faces shown on TV after they commit crimes because it is generally considered to be a disgrace to the family. Finally, aware that they are watched by the general public, the lawyers and judges will have to make sure that the law is followed strictly and the justice is done to the highest standards.

  Admittedly, TV trials, particularly the live shows, may bring about negative effects as well. Often the TV trials will present a lot of details of the criminal offenses such as killing, embezzling, cheating, so much so that they become a promotion of these crimes. As a matter of fact, many juvenile offenders admit they have been under great influences of TV criminal shows. More importantly, in TV criminal trials, lawyers and judges may often pay more attention to their own personal images to the TV viewers, thus forgetting the real purpose of the trial, which is to find if a person is guilty or innocent and in this way, the justice may be sacrificed.

  However, I personally do like the idea of putting criminal trials on TV. Besides telling us right from wrong in a more vivid way and preempting us from committing crimes, TV trials will let us know how the punishment is meted out and how justice is done. This, I believe, is what our basic civil right is all about.

 

  老师笔记

  Whether criminal trials should be shown on TV or not has always been a controversial issue. After discussing the advantages of this practice and its disadvantages, I come to believe televising criminal trials is a good thing as long as its negative effects are brought well under control.

  (1) 本段引出话题,明确观点。这种写法中规中矩,不出奇,但也不会出大问题。(2) controversial adj. 有争议的(3) bring something well under control 很好地控制......(4) “电视播放罪犯审判”这一表达是本文的核心所在,需要反复提及,英文中要注意使用替换,本段提供了两个表达法:criminal trials (are) shown on TV; televising criminal trials。

  Showing criminal trials on TV can serve multiple purposes at the same time such as educational, deterrent and regulatory. When watching how criminals are tried and sentenced, TV viewers will learn a great deal about the law and the legal system. In fact, it was from a televised trial that I understood it is a violation of law if you do not stop your car when you see a stop sign. Meanwhile, TV trials can help bring down the crime rate. People are fearful of their faces shown on TV after they commit crimes because it is generally considered as a disgrace to the family. Finally, aware that they are watched by the general public, the lawyers and judges will have to make sure that the law is followed strictly and the justice is done to the highest standards.

  (1) 本段讨论电视审判的三个好处,并在句中具体地概括出来,然后分别论述(每个点使用2句)。(2) multiple adj. 多样的;多种的(3) deterrent adj. 威慑性的(4) regulatory adj. 调节的;规范的(5) sentence v. 除了做“句子”讲,还有“判刑”的意思。(6) bring down = reduce 降低(7) Aware that they..., the lawyers and judges...,这个句型是形容词短语前置作状语。高分作文中,句式灵活变化是必要的,因此平时要注意积累和练习。

  Admittedly, TV trials, particularly the live shows, may bring about negative effects as well. Often the TV trials will present a lot of details of the criminal offenses such as killing,embezzling, cheating, so much so that they become a promotion of these crimes. As a matter of fact, many juvenile offenders admit they have been under great influences of TV criminal shows. More importantly, in TV criminal trials, lawyers and judges may often pay more attention to their own personal images to the TV viewers, thus forgetting the real purpose of the trial, which is to find if a person is guilty or innocent and in this way, the justice may be sacrificed.

  (1) 本段讨论电视审判可能带来的消极影响,包括对观众的影响和法官的影响。(2) bring about 带来;产生(3) embezzle v. 贪污(4) juvenile adj. 青少年的(5) “罪犯”的不同说法:law-breaker; criminal; law-offender; law-violator

  However, I personally do like the idea of putting criminal trials on TV. Besides telling us right from wrong in a more vivid way and preempting us from committing crimes, TV trials will let us know how the punishment is meted out and how justice is done. This, I believe, is what our basic civil right is all about.

  (1) 本段提出自己的观点。对于双边讨论型作文题目,在“自己观点”段中,最重要的是提出自己判断的标准。本文的标准是:我们有权利知道罪犯的审判过程。(2) preempt v. 预先阻止(3) mete out punishment 量刑

  参考译文

  罪犯审判是否应该在电视上播放一直都是一个富有争议的问题。在讨论完这种做法的优势和劣势后,我倾向于认为,只要很好地控制其消极影响,电视播放罪犯审判是件好事。

  电视播放罪犯审判可同时起到多种作用,比如教育作用、威慑作用和规范作用。当观众在电视上看见罪犯被审讯和判刑时,观众会学到很多关于法律和法律体制的知识。事实上,正是通过一次电视审判,我才最终理解到,如果你看到“停止”标志时却不停车,那你就违法了。同时,电视审判还可以降低犯罪率。人们很害怕犯罪后自己的脸会出现在电视上,因为这会被视为给家庭抹黑。最后,当律师和法官知道大众在看着他们时,他们就会努力确保严格执法并标准地带来公正。

  不可否认,电视审判,尤其是直播的节目,也会带来消极的影响。电视审判经常会展示很多犯罪细节,比如杀人,贪污,欺骗等,以至于这些电视审判变成了推销犯罪。事实上,很多青少年罪犯都承认,他们曾经受到了电视犯罪节目的巨大影响。更重要的是,在电视罪犯审判中,律师和法官常常更关注他们给电视观众的个人形象,而忘记了审判的真正目的是决定某人有罪还是无罪,这样,也许就有失公正了。

  然而,就个人而言,我喜欢电视播放罪犯审判。电视审判除了可以用更形象的方式告诉我们对错,并预先阻止我们犯罪外,还会让我们知道到底是怎样量刑的,公平到底是如何实现的。我相信,这正是我们的基本民权意义所在。

(文 唐伟胜 新航道特约雅思学术顾问)

 

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